


Why horror rules must always be followed

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Horror, Attempt at Humor, Grimdark, Horror, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Psychological Horror, Satire, Some Humor, Survival Horror
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-08-05
Updated: 2013-08-05
Packaged: 2017-12-22 13:00:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/913500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You know all those unspoken rules you never break in the horror genre? Well, time to explore why we follow those rules with each chapter. Some characters will be genre savvy, others... not so much.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Why horror rules must always be followed

**Author's Note:**

> This is a satire of the horror genre, and why there are all these rules that everyone knows that the characters will die if they break them. Here's my attempt to play off of them. The rules are taken from here: http://freaky_freya.tripod.com/horror_movie_rules.html  
> This is my first Homestuck fanfiction, so I'm sorry if the characters are written badly.  
> Anyways, Enjoy!

_Horror Movie Rule No. 1: When it seems you have killed the monster, never check to see if it's really dead. ___

__The electric pole fell in a shower of sparks. It tumbled onto the dog/squid/human/monster/whatever it was. Jack made a gurgling noise. Red blood was spilled everywhere. Jack twitched once and was still. John smiled, turning to his girlfriend, Rose. The nightmare was finally over. It was finally over! They could go home to their families. If only Dave and Jade could celebrate with them. Jack had claimed them as victims, but they had avenged them._ _

__Rose hugged John suddenly, sobbing into his chest. The ordeal had been exhausting for them both, but they had come out stronger. Both of them. John stroked her hair, and said soothing words. John just had to make sure. He had to make sure the thing was dead, so it could never hurt anyone again. He pulled himself away from Rose, gently. "I'm just making sure it's dead, ok?" He kissed her forehead. He walked over to it._ _

__His foot tapped the creature once, then again. No movements. John breathed a sigh of relief. Then, in a s wift motion, Jack pushed the pole off of him, and to the side. John froze up, his eyes wide. "B-But, how?" was all he could say as Jack grabbed him. Rose seeing this, Stepped back a few times herself. Rose ran, tears streaming down her face. She would not witness John's death. She would survive and warn others. It was all she could do._ _

__Jack stabbed John in the heart, killing him instantly. He pulled out his sword and began heading in the direction the girl had run off to. She would not escape him._ _

__Rose was running out of breath. She knew she had to make it to safety. Safety was her only thought. She saw a house up the hill, well lit. She just had to make it there. Her friend Kanaya lived there. She would be safe. Kanaya would help her. It was her last hope. She arrived at the door, and began pounding on it. Moments later, her friend opened the door. Relief flooded her. She was safe. Kanaya let her in, quickly closing, locking, and dead-bolting the door. One can never to be too careful. Rose told her about everything that had happened. She began sobbing again. Kanaya reassured her everything would be just fine._ _

**Author's Note:**

> Okay this was a little serious for the first chapter, but now, you get the point. Chapter 2 will be up soon!


End file.
